What’s A Life?

How would you define life?

I’d say that a life is something that experiences the world through senses. That begs another question: Where is the line between clusters of sensory cells such as a jelly in the ocean and a being that truly experiences the universe? Furthermore, can we as advanced sensory-based beings really say what is life?

Elements, molecules, and atoms can’t learn chemistry, yet they organize themselves to make up the universe. Computers can’t code themselves, but they also can when given a little push. Where does the line of sentience begin and a impulsive-based existence end? These aren’t questions I can answer but I can point out some bullshit that comes about through them.

I’m an American. Our culture values lives fairly arbitrarily. Some people put humans above all other life in the universe. Some care more for their pets than anything else. Some care about the well-being of insects while others are quick to spray them with poison to bring about peace of mind for themselves. What bugs me is that people get on their high-horse about animal abuse when it comes to dogs or cats but don’t give a rat’s ass about anything else.

I am a FISH CARETAKER. YEAH BITCH.

I love my fish. You can see them in the blog header. I spend around 5 hours a week making sure they’re fed, their water is at the right level and temperature, the tank is clean, you get the point. I care a whole lot about those little fuckers. Yet, people decide their lives don’t matter to the point that they keep them in plastic bags at fairs and hand them out as fun prizes. Not just that but I’ve heard stories of Greek life in colleges using them as part of initiations. WHAT THE FUCK?! It’s unfathomable to me that people can see fish as just an ornament or something to play pranks with. Imagine forcing people to eat puppies as a prank or giving out kittens in claustrophobic boxes at carnivals. Yeah, you get where I’m coming from. Just because you don’t like fish or don’t see them as equal to other animals doesn’t make you right.

We make up rules for life. Less than 200 years ago we had it written in our constitution that some people were worth 3/5 of others. Even today I bet there’s some subhuman trash (see what I did there) who still think this. So don’t sit there flicking your boogers with instagram open on your phone in your other hand while you scroll through this post and saying into your screen ‘oh my god, anonymousdoob you’re full of shit’. I will cut you. With my words. You’re wrong. We simply make up what matters and what has value at any given moment in time.

So….shit where was I going with this post? I don’t know, just take a look in the mirror and realize everything you believe in is influenced by things you’ve heard, read, and seen. That doesn’t make any of it true. Expand your reality and try to have a little sympathy for that freezing spider just chilling on your windowsill. If it bites you, by all means, kill it, but don’t sit here saying it deserves to die for existing. You’re not God, asshole. Even if you were God I’d be God too and I’d smite you into the shadow realm. So yeah.

-DoobTube

I Don’t Need it but it Would be Awfully Nice

How often do you use a variation of the phrase in the title? Whenever the concept of habits and vices comes up in conversation with friends and acquaintances this idea seams to surface. Most people would say they’re in control of their damaging or unwanted behaviors.

One thing that needs to be a more universal concept is that habits and dare I say it — addictions — need to be greater understood. I say the word addiction and your brain likely jumps to the extreme: celebrities overdosing, homeless people shooting up on the street, kids and Fortnite. That’s not it at all. That’s like me saying the word “religion” and your brain immediately jumping to the crusades.

Addiction is from what I’ve seen, vastly more pervasive than anyone cares to admit. By definition addiction is “A persistent, compulsive dependence on a behavior or substance.”

Now, think. How many aspects of your life fall under that definition? I can think of a few off the top of my head. I feel a compulsion to eat food, specifically junk food, when I’m bored. I doubt I’m hungry or need the sustenance — my primary motivation for eating — but I still do it. My phone also comes to mind. I’ll admit, I feel antsy if I don’t know where my phone is. Sometimes, I’ll absentmindedly reach for my phone even if it isn’t there. For a period I couldn’t even take a shit without having my phone to entertain me. On a surface level these behaviors are fairly innocuous. If I confided in you that I had a problem with eating snacks and being on my phone you’d probably laugh, say that you relate somehow, and we’d move on without skipping a beat in the conversation.

Technological addiction has become a talking point as much as the weather and nobody bats an eye. Imagine casually talking about your cocaine addiction in front of the water cooler with your co-worker? We practically do that with the concept of caffeine dependence. Nobody cares. There isn’t a war on addiction going on in this nation. There is a war on addictions we don’t like, namely: opiates, cigarettes, various other narcotics, and to a much lesser extent, alcohol.

Cigarettes are a fascinating look into the world of sociological opinion when it comes to addiction and dependence, dependence being the substance-specific nomenclature for addiction. Cigarettes (normal, not the jazz kind), once as ubiquitous as water fountains or restrooms, have gone from integral to frowned-upon. The unsettling realization by our past few generations that lies had been perpetuated by the money-makers to cover their asses has created a population of jaded individuals. There’s a reason the nicotine vape explosion has the FDA concerned and Facebook moms shitting their pants.

Most families contain a smoker or an ex-smoker. Most encourage the smoker to quit and the ex-smoker to keep going with abstinence. For good reason! We want our loved ones to live healthier, longer lives and we understand now the implications of a cigarette addiction. The funny thing is, people still smoke. So forget the research, the cautions, the taxes. Something about this addiction brings people back. We need to explore this more. Stop blaming the cigarettes and the companies and explore why we humans have self-destructive tendencies. Sure, if the temptation of the cig were gone then people wouldn’t be as likely to pick up the habit. If not a cigarette then these individuals would find something else to fill the void (See rampant alcoholism in a society that prohibits less destructive intoxicants).

Self-destructive behaviors. Everyone’s got them. I had a Juul habit for the past two years that I’ve only recently quit. I don’t call myself an ex-addict because all it takes is one puff off that little robot and I’m back on the wagon. We need to update that expression, by the way. I’m back in the Uber, bitch. Back to the topic. I haven’t hit a Juul in a little over a month from my records. Yep, I keep records of this kind of thing. If you’re serious about changing a habit or behavior then documenting it is incredibly effective. Imagine playing a video game but having no recollection of how far you’ve progressed? It’d be a lot less satisfying I’d imagine. I’ve actually removed a number of damaging habits from my life in the past few years. Subsequently, I’ve had to address a lot of subconscious unpleasantness about how I see my past self. It’d be weird to feel negatively about who I’m going to be because I have no idea so I don’t usually feel those emotions about future me.

Substance use and compulsive behavior often covers up the shit-storm underneath. We’re all going through life and it ain’t easy, no matter where you’re at socioeconomically. I challenge you to find someone who doesn’t have regrets about something they did in the past. Not just things they did, either. I’m talking things done to you that have stuck with you and cause you some kind of grief. Perhaps it’s subconscious, like not being able to handle criticism or not being able to acknowledge shortcomings. Either way, every human being goes through these struggles. Even the most ideal person probably feels bad for being too perfect, I don’t know. The point is, for us to even begin to address the problems of addiction, we need to empathize and find our role in the concept. Are we judging others, unaware of our own dependencies? Have we conquered an addiction and don’t even realize it? What habits do we rely on now that may slip into something more serious in a less comfortable future?

Ask yourself these questions from time to time. You may not be able to solve everyone’s problems for them but I firmly believe mass change happens on an individual level. We feel helpless when we hear about pollution and war and suffering but the only thing we truly control is the future of our personal vessel. By awakening yourself to your suffering you can begin to heal, and once the healing is complete you can help heal others (ensure your oxygen mask is secured before helping those around you). Ideas and behaviors spread like a disease within our society. If we try to spread the good things, we can all make a difference, no matter how insignificant it may seem.

Let me just say before I finish that I have an incredibly addictive personality and will probably never truly break free from its clutches. It has manifested in various ways since my childhood and I’m likely to have fit the category of a fiend, aka someone you’d look down on and feel better about yourself by watching. That being said, if you’re suffering from any kind of addiction: I fucking feel ya. Don’t get down because you suffer from these things. Some of us are more prone to it than others. Like any handicap, mental or physical, it can be worked around to create a happy, fulfilling life. Don’t ever let someone make you feel like you’re lesser because your self-control doesn’t come so easily. Listen to what they’re saying and why they’re saying it and prove to them that it won’t stop you. I’ll always have more admiration for the guy in a wheelchair who gets through a marathon than the able-bodied person who breezes through it. Meditate often. Exercise. Find a hobby that occupies your hands. It helps a lot, trust me.

Talk to you soon

-AnonDoob

Blending Days

Routine is a great thing. At what point does it become Bill Murray in Groundhog Day? That is, days repeating and blending like watercolors until it becomes an indistinguishable brown.

You ever just have a mini “wake-up” where you realize you’ve been doing your thing so long you’ve become lost in translation? I feel it sometimes, becoming so focused on doing the right things and progressing in life, only to question my very existence. I begin to ask myself why I’m doing what I’m doing, where I hope to go with it, and whether I’m content. It can be awfully discouraging when things seem stagnant. Sometimes I even wonder if what I’m doing is what I’m supposed to do. The weight of every decision seems to pull you further and further in one direction. If that happens to you then that’s cool. We’re in this thing together. I tend to ramble when I think. One thought cascading into another like rapids in a river. I’m just a kayak being tossed through the water.

You’re probably thinking ‘hey man chill the fuck out, it ain’t that serious’. You’d be right. I have to laugh at myself sometimes. Underrated skill, self-deprecation. Just make sure it’s all jokes because it’s easy to slip into believing it for real.

I’m not a fan of the idea that success in our society is like crabs in a bucket. I don’t think you need to climb on top of someone else like Yertle the Turtle to become the king. Be your own king. One of the coolest things about being alive is you’re the only one able to see the world from your paradigm. No matter how much better someone else’s life may seem to be they can never see the world through your two eyes. Nobody can take that from you. Take your vantage point and learn how to express your own unique experience.

Moving Forward

Physics doesn’t just apply to the world around us, it works in our lives too. A human at rest stays at rest unless acted upon by an outside force, typically stress.

I’m no stranger to this concept. I’ve been complacent much of my life because it was the easiest path to take. Think of oil in a pan — it just fills in the easiest route to take without worrying about coating the entire pan. It’s up to the cook to make sure the oil goes where it needs to. We can be our own cooks. If the oil is our motivation and drive, we have to direct it to have it balance out our life pan. It’s an art, really. We have to tilt our motivation in the direction it needs to find an equilibrium.

Think of your hobbies and the things you do to feel good like working out or taking walks or even cooking. You can’t spend all your energy doing one thing. If you’re in school you can’t be studying all the time. Even the most driven people in the world — your Elon Musk types — can’t accomplish what they need to without a balance.

Check yourself. Take a look at how your’re spending your time and how you’re directing your energies. Time is our most essential resource. Are you filling yours with things to balance you as a person? If not that’s ok. Come back to the idea of physics in day-to-day life. Get the ball rolling with your habits. Start the thing that has been nagging at the back of your mind. For me, it was writing this post.

It’s cliche and annoying to hear but the only thing preventing you from doing the things you’d like to do is yourself. Want to get in shape? Start by exercising when you get the chance. Find what works for you. If that means doing 10 push-ups every time you get killed in a video game then so be it. We’re creatures of habit, humans. I read somewhere that it takes a month of consistent behavior for it to become a habit. Habits become things that are essential to our routine that make us feel out-of-whack without them. What do you want your habits to be? Drinking a beer every evening when you get home? How about flossing your teeth while you watch your evening tv show? Maybe meditating before going to sleep?

Get started now. Don’t wait. The clock is ticking on you becoming who you desire to be. Get up, get out, go get it.

-AnonymousDoob

Our Environment

Happy Saturday! If you don’t want to read a preachy rant then just close this tab and enjoy your day.

Something has been bugging me lately and that’s that something hasn’t been bugging me. I’ll clarify: I’ve become so immune to seeing trash scattered outside that it doesn’t phase me as much as it used to. People generally just seem to give less and less of a shit about keeping nature untarnished and care more about immediate gratification than taking a minute or two to walk over to a trash can.

I’ll admit, I’m on the more extreme side of caring about the environment. I’ve grown up being taught about the beauty and fragility of the ecosystems around us and find the natural world a bit more interesting/important than the average guy. That being said though, I can’t be the only who winces when I see a pile of discarded fast food wrappers on the side of the road. I certainly can’t be the only one who gets pissed off when I’m driving and the butt of a lit cigarette is casually flicked out the window of the car ahead and bounces in front of me as I drive over it. Fuck you people. If you’re gonna smoke a cigarette then do it near an ashtray, and if you need that nicotine fix so desperately then get a juul or another vape. I’m sympathetic to addiction — it’s a hard thing to beat. I’m not sympathetic to willful ignorance nor the inability to have the smallest consideration for those around you.

I don’t believe it’s possible to leave a carbon footprint of zero. We humans are inherently wasteful creatures, indiscriminately shitting and pissing everywhere. We’re evolved apes people, I don’t expect us to sit around in frilly hats and give off zero energy.

We go to zoos and giggle at the monkeys flinging their crap at each other and feel good about how civilized we are. Really though, they’re more civilized than we are in many ways. Last I checked we’re the ones causing the depletion of our ozone layer. We’re also the ones destroying the great barrier reef, chopping down old-growth trees for better views, and driving across the street to go to the gym (Maybe that one’s just me).

It’s unbelievable that caring about the environment is considered a divisive issue. I know people on all sides of the political spectrum who care about keeping mother nature safe. I guess mother nature could be offensive to some now…I’ll just call it nature. Point is, fuck the people in power using “environmentalism” as a negative or self-righteous term. You’re not a better person for caring about the environment, nor are you a better person for driving that hybrid. What makes you a good person is understanding why it’s important to care about the environment. I mean, cmon, if someone came into your apartment and dropped some crusty old underwear next to your bed you’d get pretty pissed I’d imagine. No? You’re weird then, but I try not to judge what people are into. Earth is our home people, the same way some consider America their home. You patriots wouldn’t be too pleased if the dern Mexicans flung trash over your precious wall into our country so stop driving around with your goddam truck-nut having lifted scraps of metal spewing clouds of shit into OUR air. You’re not owning anyone. And for that matter, you hippy, organic, smelly ass wannabees need to stop lording your personal choices over other people. The number of bumper stickers on the back of your 2001 Subaru does not increase the length of your untrimmed junk.

I’ll get off my soapbox. Just give a shit about stuff. If you distance yourself from reality so much because you don’t like it then you’re not living life, you’re just kinda floating in it. Caring can hurt sometimes but it’s better than being apathetic. And you can’t spell apathetic without pathetic. Now get out there, go hug a tree, give it a kiss and tell it you’ll be back after you pick up some cigarettes from the store. Just be sure not to smoke them in the car in front of me 😉

Later.

First Post

Hey.

I’ve never had a blog before. Can’t even remember the last time I posted on social media beyond updating a profile picture once every few years. I’m not even a technological hermit — just not a huge fan of how all of it impacted me. I like the idea of this though. Something to get my thoughts out and maybe influence a person or two.

post

I like that picture. Anyway, how you doing? Having a good day? Even if you’re not that’s cool. No worries, I have not so good days sometimes too. Pretty sure that’s just part of being human. How does the picture make you feel?

I get a sense of calm for sure. Makes me think of those days at the beach where the evening air is a little sticky, not in an unpleasant way. You can smell the brine of the sea — that sort of salty/planty smell.

Anyway, I’m gonna go for now. Thanks for reading. Peace.